Tough Sticky

28 01 2009

avant_album

Lynne likes this song, “When it hurts” .  The message is important.  Relationships, dating/friendships/family are all measured by how we respond to the difficult moments.  The singer Avant has a lyric about “changing people’s definition of love” by reminding everyone that its the tough times that count.  Seeing as we’re in a tough time globally, I hope we’ll all remember.

I can happily say that my friends and family have always been there for me in troubling moments, whether in support or to argue a constructive point of their own.

Boyfriends are another story.  I can only think of one boyf that ever stuck around for an argument.  Granted, I don’t pick many fights, and most debates I have a winning point.  It seems strange, but I’m hoping my next boyfriend will invest enough of himself to argue for the sake of improving our relationship or clearing up misperceptions.  Not just giving up on things that don’t seem to work.  Not just giving up on me.

I agree, its easier to avoid conflict all together, especially at the risk of making a girl cry.  But delivering constructive criticism is a service of honesty between two friends.  Discussing personal opinions, no matter how controversial or awkward, should also be comfortable, if not mutually respectful.

Excerpted Lyrics: When it hurts” by Avant

When it hurts, will we still be
The same two lovers
All over each other
When it hurts, will we still see
What we got together
Promise that we’ll never
Never ever be
Temporary (Not Another)
Ordinary (Uh uh)
We should change people’s definition of love
So forget what you heard
The only way that this will work
Is if you love me when it hurts
Can you love when it hurts

Babygirl we gotta face it
There’ll be times that we let each other down
And on the days that you ain’t feeling me
Will you be able to stick around
Cause anything worth having is worth fighting for
If we really want this thing to work
We gotta go to war
Girl, I’m in this thing
I mean we’re in this thing
But through the tears will you still be here

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One response

31 01 2009
Julie

I would have to agree that it in order to be a good friend or to have a true relationship, I believe constructive criticism is good. If you can’t be honest with a friend then how is it a real relationship?

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