I just signed on to my first online dating site, ChocolateMate.com. Its geared towards black singles, and I always wondered if it would be annoying or offensive to sign up as an asian girl. Now, I’m more curious to see if I’ll get the same amount of attention as I would if I were at a nightclub filled with black singles. They seem to like Asian girls there, so why not online?
While I still prefer to meet people in person, I like online dating because its freakishly efficient. You don’t get the same sixth-sense intuitionary vibes that you get when you first meet eyes with someone across the room, but you get alot of details out, quick and easy. You know how much I love things that are freakishly efficient. Sign up. Its free.
Okay, and lets discuss the “once you go black, you don’t go back.” I absolutely hate when people say this, especially when they’re referring to me! I’m only on my second black boyfriend, sheesh! The real reason I seem to prefer black men:
1. They don’t take certain things for granted. The men who are professionally motivated work twice as hard to achieve their goals, because they have to. I’m the same way. There’s too much at stake when you’re not a member of the machine, especially with all the good ‘ol southern boys of Georgia. Not that this always happens, but there’s always a chance that someone is holding a prejudice against me, whether its because I’m a woman, have squinty asian eyes, have a foreign last name, look too young, too pretty or too ugly. There’s too much at stake to not be on my game at all times.
2. I like new experiences, and before moving to Atlanta 2 years ago, I had never dated a black man. I had never really been exposed to many intelligent, successful black people. I can only think of 3 friends growing up that were black. Growing up in a redneck town and filipino naval base was pretty limiting. I had never met a Jewish person until college. Wow, huh?
3. I can’t wait to “mutt my kids up.” Both my parents are Filipino, and I know that by marrying another Filipino, I already know exactly how we would live our lives for the rest of our lives. It would be a whole string of catholic celebrations: baptisms, first communions, prayer celebrations. Christmas is the only one I look forward to anymore. Anyway, there would also be soooo many expectations to fulfill, because I’m competitive, and I would want to measure up to the previous benchmarks set by my cousins. An interracial marriage would not only provide gorgeous children, but a totally unique marriage experience that no one in my family has experienced before, and I look forward to my future husband and I sharing our different culture and upbringing.
4. Physically, they don’t have tan lines, and when we’re holding hands, I love the tone of their chocolate complexion next to my caramel complexion…… and Yes, they have larger than life man parts.
Lynne\'s Life 
this is ur best blog yet!! =)
Go for yours sis. Love has no color.
http://blacksinglesblacksingles.spaces.live.com/blog/
love has no colour and U should have men who works twice as hard. Perfect.
“Physically, they don’t have tan lines, and when we’re holding hands, I love the tone of their chocolate complexion next to my caramel complexion…… and Yes, they have larger than life man parts.”
You should probably say that you like dark skinned black men. There are some black men who are lighter than caramel and I don’t think that you’d like that if you don’t like tan lines. As for me, I am a black woman and I will stick to the Italian men.
LOL @ “larger than life man parts.”
It is true though….
U are wierd
“An interracial marriage would not only provide gorgeous children.”
Umm… have you seen Tiger Woods?
Mister, Duly noted.
“4. Physically, they don’t have tan lines, and when we’re holding hands, I love the tone of their chocolate complexion next to my caramel complexion…… and Yes, they have larger than life man parts.”
That’s like me saying “..by the way Asian girls have flat asses, and I find their subservience so appealing.” As a black man, I find your fetishism hilarious. Please grow some brain cells.
Mister, you’re right. I have a flat Asian ass and chest. Some stereotypes are true generalities. There’s nothing offensive about stating the obvious. I’ll even admit to my subservience to my parents.
Admitting that she likes our good man stuff, or aesthetically enjoys the color combination has NOTHING to do with lacking brain cells!!
She can be a brilliant, charismatic, poetic math professor and still confess objective pleasure in flowers, sunsets, and caramel with chocolate.
I can be open minded, versatile and entirely personality motivated and yet still love the teardrop of a 34 B Breast or the heart shape of a delicious ass. Your comment is more brainless than hers. She doesn’t say that large man parts and contrast replace imagination and generosity!
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I love the idea of interacial dating and diversity. Even though people are people, it’s never good to conclude that everybody of the same race has the same qualities and attribues. I’ve heard this a lot over the years, from people who have bad relationship experiences with people of their own race. Out of frustration and hurt, most people (including myself) would sometimes, rather believe that there is a problem with an entire group of people, than to believe that sometimes bad things happen to good people. Maybe a peson has an internal struggle with themself that causes them to be drawn to people that they know aren’t right for them. These things can lead to relationships not working out. It is necessary for all of us to look at ourself and figure out why we may persue relationships with people that disappoint and hurt us. Of course, this is not the case with all of us, but can be an unfair to to the person of another race that you pursue. Belive it or not, race has nothing to do with how good or bad a person will be. In fact, a person could find themslef being unfair to their new mate, because of such high expectations of a better relationship, simply because it is with a person of another race. I hate to say this, but all Black men, don’t have larger than life sex organs and all White men don’t have small sex organ. Beleive me, I know from experience of being in long term relationships with both. I am an African American woman, who is open to dating men of other races as well as my own, but I realize that race truly, truly has nothing at all to do with their character. Sometimes, the culture that they come from, can play a part on their ideals and beliefs. For example, the difference between middle eastern culture and American cultures, when it comes to women’s and men’s rights and responsibilities. When it comes to cultural differnces, even the way an American woman dresses can be a problem. Especially the cultural differnces, that have to do with marriage. Ultimately, if you are like me and are open to people of other races, make sure that your choice in dating, relationships or marriage is Not purely based on the fact that your person of choice is of another race. No one wants to believe that the only thing their mate find’s attractive about them is their race. I sure wouldn’t.
Good Luck, Peace!
Used to think “once you’ve had black..” was a complete myth till it happened to me.
2 yrs on from my first experience — and I still can’t stop being attracted to men of “a certain complexion” — but, hey, it’s lovely — so why fight it?! lol!
i was searching for tyson beckford pics and came across your blog. i love it! so straight forward and honest. i’m so glad i decided to “mutt up” my children, they’re beyond beautiful and they don’t have to worry about fitting any one stereotype because of their mutt status (black, white, hispanic). of course, i didn’t have sex with a black man for the SOLE purpose of my kids, it’s just an added bonus.
“I love the tone of their chocolate complexion next to my caramel complexion.”
I weep for any children you may have, lady. Your value system is truly bizarre.
Yasmeen, thanks for your coherent expression. David, your moronic viewpoint doesn’t even warrant my attention.
I will say it again, nothing turns me off like hearing “I only date black men,” or “I don’t date men of [my race].” And worse, you reduce our essence to the same ole phallic attribution that is pathetically boring. Then you turn around and wonder why we view you as easy sluts. I challenge you to find a black man with any brain cells that would read this post and ever take you seriously.
I think any person with any common sense of self worth whatsoever would be offended by being fetishized. Besides, who wants to be with someone who doesn’t find a reflection of themselves appealing?
I LOVE TYSON BECKFORD!!! HE IS SO SEXY AND HANDSOME AND CUTE AND EVERYTHING ABOUT HIS PHYSICAL BEING IS PERFECT!!
I AM KOREAN BUT LOVE BLACK MEN. THEY JUST LIKE ALL OTHER MEN ITS JUST THE NEGATIVE STEREOTYPICAL VIEW OF THEM THAT CAUSES OTHERS TO LOOK DOWN ON THEM.
I LOVE YOUR BLOG, JUST TOO GOOD!!
LOL ya’ll killin me see….i also came across this blog from lookin for pics of ma man Tyson 🙂
Girl if you like ur black wood i aint amd at ya lol…i’m black too but have never dated a guy of another race.
Yawn wrote:
> Besides, who wants to be with
> someone who doesn’t find a
> reflection of themselves appealing?
That’s very insightful. I did hear that people are usualy attracted to their similars (pardon my English), and your “a reflection of themselves” perhaps sheds some light on this.
Yawn wrote:
> I think any person with any
> common sense of self worth
> whatsoever would be offended
> by being fetishized.
Well. I guess so. I do hope that if such moment arrives at my door, that I’ll indeed be offended.
Yasmeen wrote:
> In fact, a person could find
> themslef being unfair to their
> new mate, because of such
> high expectations of a better
> relationship
Yep. And knowing that somebody is expecting you to live up to their expectations, whatever they are, is horrible. And it makes you feel as if you’re a pretender. I once dated somebody who (erroneously) thought I was an extremely wise guy, and the day I left her was a good day for me because I feld I’m finally free, free to be my real dumb self.
date who you want to date. Just don’t make yourself blind to certain people soley based on the colour of their skin. You might be missing out on alot of really great people and/or relationships. Date black, brown, yellow, red, white.. date pruple if you want!! don’t close windows before they open. that’s my take on it.
I just wanted to add that I also stumbled upon this blog after googling Tyson Beckford. He’s a hottie, what can I say!? 😛